Thursday, November 14, 2013

You Are Your Harshest Critic

This week I am focusing on looking at my insecurities and putting a positive spin on them. What prompted this was a section from my Brene Brown book as well as this neat photo I found on Pinterest ~ Ironically I found the picture right after reading the section from my book. Even more Ironic, this is me all summed up, in a cute little img:

I've always viewed myself on the negative side. And I believed, through other peoples actions, that these thoughts were true. "Gosh I'm so abnormal, I care way too much about everything and I'm always bothering people and why can't I be outgoing like everyone else..." Because I believed these negative things about myself, I shut down. I assumed that since I wasn't getting the response I was hoping for, there was something wrong with me. I shriveled up and backed off, I locked myself up and then I didn't really know who I was anymore.

Now with a clearer head I am able to look at these traits of mine as gifts.

I am sensitive. I feel everything! I feel emotions, I absorb them like a sponge. What I'm feeling is a cue, a cue to what's going on with me, if I listen carefully it'll lead me in the right direction.

I am not bothersome. I care and I want to show that. If others are uninterested or don't want to share that with me, that's ok. I am going to show my appreciation without expectation because that's my gift and it makes me happy to do so.

I am quiet. I take time to warm up, and my words only flow freely when I feel able to be 100% myself, a downfall and a gift all at the same time. If I am unable to speak up or if I speak up too much with anxiety, it is my own cue to re-evaluate the situation that I am in.

 ~ Mind blown~

It took two pages from a book and this picture to get me to learn this lesson.

My life is beginning to feel like a Sherlock Holmes novel. I have to follow the clues to figure out who I am. It's a journey and I'm enjoying every minute of it!

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