First Day of School!

Today was bear's first day of school and she had a wonderful time! I was only able to observe her for a few moments but we talked a while afterwards about her day and it is clear that she is absolutely 100% happy to be there!

My favorite thing she said at the end of school:

"Somebody else had the same shoes as me! She was nice to me!"

My heart immediately relaxed with ease when I heard this. A small part of me can't help but worry how she will get along with the other kiddos - Will they like her? Will she like them? Will they be mean to her? Will she be mean to them? - Our conversation instantly reminded me that she is just in preschool; baby steps momma, baby steps! 

And though I've been a little nervous, bear has been absolutely ecstatic about school starting for a some time now. Everyday for the past few weeks she has asked me if it was time to go to school. My little social butterfly, she just couldn't wait to get out there and meet new people! 

With all the constant chatter about school starting, I knew she would be incredibly excited today but I am still a little surprised that I didn't get even the smallest goodbye wave when she entered the classroom. Not even a simple look or one single blown kiss. Nadda! Nothing!

Well, if that wasn't enough of a surprise, I was in for even more of a shock when I returned because she was extremely upset with me for thinking that I could just return to school and pick her up at the end of the day. She clearly would have been much happier if I had somehow forgotten her, left her to go home with the teachers I presume. How dare I be such an awful mother and actually consider coming back to get her? 

I say this all in good fun though, I didn't pay it much attention, and when bear was done huffing and puffing about my horrible decision to pick her up, she decided to tell me everything that she had done while I was gone.

A part of me was certainly a little upset that she didn't miss me at all but I'm also just as happy that she wasn't sad or uncomfortable to be there. She is a sociable girl, she said hello to every kid we passed on the way into the building. She is not like me one bit; I was the shy, timid kid hiding behind her mom on the first day. I'm glad she's so confident and excited to meet new friends, a skill that will serve her well in the future, I'm sure.

So good luck to my bear though I know you won't need it! 

You're as sharp as a whistle!

You're as bright as a star!

And I love you in absolutely every way that you are!

Can't wait to see all the wonderful things you learn this year!

It's Time for School!

So much has been going on lately. A lot is about to change. In less than three weeks bear will begin preschool.

Originally we planned for her to attend the two day program but since we registered late we had to sign her up for the three-day-a-week classroom.

My heart sank when I heard the director tell me this. The tears started to pool at the base of my eyelids...

If you heard me sniffle would you reconsider? 

I just don't think that I'm ready for her to be away that much during the week. Granted it's only about three extra hours, but for some reason one extra day feels like a full week of school. It feels like I'm not going to see bear at all. It feels terrifying!

Bear needs this though. She's ready and she will benefit from the structure and the variety of social opportunities. I think she will also benefit from not having me around, so she can go out on her own without me to fall back on. And she needs someone else to instruct her, teach her.

It will also be nice to have some one-on-one time with roo. I haven't had as much time to read and play with her as I would like. Sometimes the day ends and I feel like we hardly spoke... babbled... She's growing up so fast and each little moment is passing me by, leaving me with little opportunity to enjoy it.

Oh, but that first day is going to be quite painful. I'm terrified. Will she be sad when I leave? Will she be afraid? Will she struggle to make friends? Will she be left out when everyone goes out to play?

Granted these thoughts pop into my head but I know deep down bear will do just fine. She is sweet, loving, caring, outgoing, and loves to make friends. She'll talk to anyone who will listen, so I know some of these fears are unreasonable.

It's just hard to let your baby cub go out on her own, into the wilderness, where other creatures just might eat her up.

But I have faith. I know you will do just fine, my little bear. And when you don't, that's ok, I'll be here to pick you up, brush you off and wipe your tears.

To my sweet bear and all the other kiddos getting ready for the school year:

May you have a wonderful year!