Awaiting Hannah

So here we are, almost 24 weeks along. My stomach is quite large now and there is absolutely no way of hiding it. I am pregnant and Hannah reminds me of it every day. In fact she reminds me quite frequently through out the day. I have to say that her movements feel different than bear's. She does not kick like bear did, she seems to swivel, turn, and stretch rather then just stick her feet out as far as they can possibly go. But what's really different with Hannah is that sometimes I feel like she may be grabbing at me from the inside -- is this possible? I don't know ~ It might just be a crazy pregnancy side effect.

Or perhaps she's attempting an early exit...

The timing of her kicks are quite funny, she often kicks at night when I have bear leaning up against my large stomach, as we read bed time stories. Hannah obviously wants to be part of the fun, and with each kick I imagine how, in a year, she will be sitting on my lap too listening to stories, as we settle in for the night.

Now many of you may wonder why I immediately feel that it's ok to give away Hannah's name but not bear's. Well I don't know exactly who she is just yet: will she be a piglet, an owl, a turtle... ? I don't know what her nick name will be but I do feel her name strongly all of a sudden, as if choosing this name was absolutely the right thing to do for her. So I just don't want to hide it, at least not at this time.

My husband picked the name Hannah after favoring Ray LaMontagne's song "Hannah." It is a beautiful song and Chris told me often after bear's birth that if we had another girl he wanted her to be Hannah. So of course I said yes, I like names to have meaning. Even if it's after just a song, I look forward to the day when I can tell Hannah why we picked her name.

I do have to admit though that I did question "Hannah" briefly after we found out we were having a girl. Name butterflies I suppose... What if it's just not right? I thought on and off... Until I remembered a favorite book of mine "The Wholeness of a Broken Heart." Now don't get confused by the title. The story is about four generations of Jewish women; Hannah is the name of the main daughter. And though the relationship she has with her mother is not perfect, there is a lot of love between them. They are very close; growing up Hannah's mother was very warm, open and loving. And as I read the book early in my college years I would constantly think, maybe even pray a little, that if I was blessed with children, that I wanted to be a mother just like Hannah's... And I still hope that I can be.



So there it is. We still have a while to go. And yes I'm scared and at times overwhelmed but I know that you are going to bring us wonderful things, Hannah. I can't wait to see your beautiful face!

I blog, right?

Remember how I use to blog? Yeah. Well, I guess I forgot a little too... Seems a second pregnancy can really change a girls motivation for writing in the evening.

Now that we are almost 5 months in, the morning sickness is (FINALLY) gone and we now know that we're having a girl(!)  ~ I thought I should catch up on things a little ~ It's time to start putting some more effort back into this whole blogging thing.

Besides pregnancy news, bear had her second birthday two weeks ago. We had an amazing party for her. It was small, just a few of her friends with their families, but it ended up being a really great time for all of us. We set up at the near by nature park, barbecued, had amazing cup cakes, and the kids played happily with bubbles, in-between free wagon rides from all the daddies at the party. It was a very special day for our favorite girl!

Bear is certainly growing into her big girl self. She is still sweet in so many ways, most especially when it comes to her friends and mommy and daddy's friends, as well. She loves everyone in her life and shows it frequently with hugs. She will independently hug my best mommy friend whenever she gets the chance.

Though expression of love comes easy for bear she is having trouble sharing at times but it is more in regards to when someone takes something from her. She becomes very angry and yells "No! Stop that!" (Which is also what she yells when she's mad at anything, or anyone, lately). And if the perpatrater, who was trying to steal the desired toy, was unlucky and didn't get away with the toy, within seconds bear will go right up to the girl or boy and hand them the toy. I'm assuming she really does want to share, she just doesn't want her toys to be ripped out of her hands. And I certainly wouldn't either!

What impresses me most (still) with bear is that she continues to be very sociable. She says hi to every little girl and boy she meets without any hesitation and I have to admit that it breaks my heart at times when other children don't return her hello -- though I know this does not bother bear one bit, which is great! It just rolls right off her back and she moves on to the next big attention grabbing thing. She is nothing like her mommy, always timid and shy... I don't think she got theses amazing social skills from my side of the gene pool.

With age, comes testing and discipline and bear is getting to know the word "timeout" a little too well. The main reason she lands in the timeout chair at the ripe age of two is because she is hitting when she gets frustrated. I am trying to work with her to express herself with words when she is angry but she is still a little too young to fully understand what "angry" and "mad" really mean. So lately I take a smack or two to the head...

Bear also gets easily frustrated when she is unable to do something by herself. Which is fairly normal, but her level of frustration lately seems excessive. I'm working hard with her to try to calm down and try again. Sometimes this works fairly easily and sometimes she is just too upset. During these times I wait her out and together we try again. It's tough and some days it really wears me out but I know that it's important that she takes this time to learn that it's ok to get frustrated but we have to keep trying and not let it get the best of us. She is only two, baby steps for both of us, reminding myself that I am teach bear an important skill makes it easier when my weakest moments of low patience hit. I am not perfect but we are both learning together.

So it's summer time, the weather has been hot and thus we're spending a lot of time swimming at the pool, at the beach, and playing in the play fountains at the plaza up the road. We only have two more weeks left on our Disney pass, which we will both miss. But I'm hoping to enroll bear in a gymnastics mommy and me class before baby number two arrives. If bear likes the class she will be able to take the class independently later in the year... which will be a nice little break for mommy if all goes well!

We will miss Disney but we hope to get a new pass again once little miss number two is ready to handle a big morning outing at one of the most exciting places in southern cali.

Well that's all for now. Life is really good and I can't wait to see what amazing things our next little munchkin has to bring us.


Bear's mom